Adversity is an un-welcomed guest that does not knock on our door.
There is no sugar sweet enough to coat these words, because in reality no matter how hard we try to swerve away from it; at some point, we will come face to face with adversity no matter what.
It is always the major things that get the greatest sympathy, yet I believe that any distressful circumstance no matter how small is a form of adversity. Regardless of context, every drawback could mean a stronger comeback. From unhealthy relationships, to toxic work environments, to a rainy day when you’ve planned the perfect outdoor activity, every setback we experience provides a space where an opportunity for growth is
possible.
If there is one thing we can learn from the lives of those whose lives are lesson worthy, such as Oprah, Tony Robbins, Brenden Burchurd, for example, is that adversity was the motor that drove them forward. If they could do it, so could we, of course, given that we have the right mindset aligned with actions driven towards taking back control of our lives, and finding the silver lining out of most unpleasant situations.
For me, adversity taught me priceless lessons, it was above all the catalyst that allowed me to discover an amount of strength I never thought I had. Thanks to all the setbacks I faced, I learned to step into my own power and occupy my space in this world, albeit I am still growing.
Following are some of the most valuable lessons I learned through my
journey of self-discovery and growth:
Avoid the Victim Mentality:
Falling into the victim mentality will only keep you inside a negative feedback loop of replaying the hurt, blaming it on others, and eventually feeling helpless. By no means am I implying that some of us have not been victimized and are rightfully hurt, what I am implying is that acknowledging our responsibility towards ourselves and our healing is crucial. By taking small steps and being intentional in our healing and proactive in the process of shaping our lives, gradually but surely we can build emotional resilience and develop the right growth mindset that brings us closer to our most desired life.
Invest in Yourself:
I cannot say this enough. Invest in yourself in every possible way. We humans are an integral part of the being, the
knowing, and the doing. Each and every one of those elements conforms to an autonomous human being, and we cannot disassociate ourselves from either. So investing in each one of them separately is essential for our growth. Constantly checking in with your emotional, mental, and physical health should be a top priority,
especially when going through distressful times. You need yourself to pull you through.
Take Time to Heal and Seek Help:
There is something about adversity that makes it rarely feel like an isolated event. When setbacks strike, we often get this, “ please not again feeling”, as if every new wound touches on old ones. So taking the time to heal is important so we don’t carry old hurts with us into the future. There are many aspects to healing, and we all heal differently, in different ways and at different paces. Some of us need time alone, some seek connecting with others through family bonds, friendship, support groups, or even seek professional help. There is a misconception associated with seeking help, relating it to weakness. We are social and emotional beings and we do not thrive on our own, we crave
connection and if anything we have learned from this pandemic is how much we miss and need each other. So lets normalize talking about emotions, it’s not weakness it’s called being human.
Capitalize on It:
Grow through what you go through. Adversity has given me the opportunity to connect with the joy of life in a genuine way. I do not mean to romanticize tough moments, yet certainly they carry a message and a space for growth, given we have the right mindset. There is an old wisdom that says that we are not given the people and lessons we want, rather the people and lessons we need. I would like to think of this as true. Perhaps, every drawback is meant
to bring our attention to something we had been oblivious about in our life– something we were too busy to notice or too numb to acknowledge. Adding to this awareness is the fact that adversity brings with it chaos, and it is in the middle of chaos that our urge for change is the strongest, so capitalize on this chaos.
“I am so grateful for my years literally living in poverty, because it makes the experience of creating success and building success that much more rewarding”, Oprah Winfrey. If there is one thing we can learn from this
mega woman is that turning pain into gain is not only possible, but rather fulfilling and meaningful, and most of us agree that seeking meaning in life is one of our top priorities. While choosing our battles is wisdom, we do not
always have a choice, nevertheless, what we do have power over is how we face the things we cannot avoid.
